I try to be a good parent. I strive to support my kids' academic endeavors.  But sometimes, honestly, I wonder what the h**l those teachers are thinking.

What, for example, is the educational purpose of the diorama? Sure, we've all made one, but what does it prove you've learned?  You remember one scene from the book?  I tried doing a search on the internet, certain there were all sorts of academic sites praising the wonders of the diorama on the young mind, but I came up with nothing.  There are however, many many sites on how to make a diorama.  Really?!  Construction paper scenes in a shoebox is not exactly rocket science.  My daughter learned how to make a Powerpoint presentation in 3rd grade--why in sixth grade are they still asking her to glue stuff into a cardboard box?  And how many shoes does the school think I own that I have an endless supply of these boxes the night before the project is due?

Speaking of ridiculous requests from the schools, why do they think I have brown paper bags for my kids to cover their school books?  Who has paper bags anymore?  My son informed me he needed a book covered (of course for the next day) and the only paper bags I had were from the liquor store.  A bag from a fifth of tequila will not cover a text book. (And nor should it.)

I may not be a model parent.  I have been known to tell my kids they will never again have use for the algebra they're struggling to learn, and I once sent a kid to school doped up on children's Tylenol when they had a (slight) fever so I  could go to the gym.  The way I figure it, all the inconsequential stuff the school asks them to do is good training for real life.